The Evil That Men Do

Submitted July 20, 1997
Laudanum
From Atlanta, Georgia

• This is a response to Bryan G. about nutzo customers. I work at a 24 hour diner. As most people who have worked at them know, these places are homing beacons for poorly-adjusted people.
  
  Anyhow, I was coming off of a 12 hour shift and had only made it about two or three miles away when my pager went off with an urgent code. I went back to the store to find this elderly woman rasing Caine about how men were the source of devilish fornication (so on and so forth). She refused to leave, but she refused to allow any of our waiters to serve her because the only two we had for that shift were male, as well as the cook.
  
  I wound up having to clock back in and wait on this woman (as well as cooking her food because she didn't want the male cook to touch it), just so we could get her out the diner.
  
  The tip I got for my efforts? A 45 minute hellfire & brimstone lecture on the evils of men and their lusty ways as well as an interrogation as to the whereabouts of a "house of sin and damnned fornication" that supposedly existed "just around the corner to the left, but I'm not sure which house."
  
  Rargh. Wonder what she would have done if I told her I was unmarried and had been living with my boyfriend for six months? :)

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