Let 'Em Eat Cake

Submitted Nov. 25, 1996
Peter H.
From Queensland, Australia

• The setting: A seafood restaurant. The party: A wedding. The Guests: The world's largest collection of cheapskates.
  

  I had a booking for one hundred and forty guest to attend a reception. The bride was a sourfaced person who hated everything from the word go. The groom was already drunk and was complaining that the brides parents did not pay enough money for the reception.
  

  As the night wore on it was becoming obvious that I was going to make a loss on this party. The drinks were not free and everyone was asking for iced water. When coffee was being served, people were asking for hot water and getting teabags out of their pockets. It was terrible.
  

  The head waiter looking after the party was due to fly out of Australia in two days and it was his last night. I had thought that he would get a good tip out of doing this reception. When they paid the bill, nothing. No tip at all.
  

  The head waiter, seeing this, walked up to the bride and asked her to dance. He explained that he was going overseas to aid UNICIF. This must have worked because I saw him walk her out onto the dance floor. He danced with her for about twenty seconds and then picked her up. Everyone stared at him.
  

  He walked over to where the cake was and dumped her into the middle.
  

  I have never seen anyone run as fast as he did that night.
  

  Here the bride lay in the middle of the cake. The groom was at the bar trying to pickup the barmaid and the parents where dumbfounded.
  

  Needless to say, I did have a hard time with the owner until I showed him the bill. He then sent $AUD500.00 to the waiter as a gift.